I’m typing to you from the safety of the space under my work desk. I’ve barricaded myself in my office in hopes of surviving through the night. I’ve discovered the hard way that ZOMBIES ARE REAL!! It all started this morning….
I arrived to work thinking it would be a day like any other. I should have known something was up when I changed our closed sign to open and no one was waiting at the door to get in. No one was waiting in the parking lot either, or on the street, or…anywhere, for that matter. Everything was quiet, eerily quiet. I shrugged my shoulders and figured it was because of the weather. We had a cold spell hit overnight, 80 degree weather down to 44, and people were simply staying inside. I decided to start my day by shelving books, a task I despise because I can’t reach the tall shelves, but a task that needed to be done as all the carts were toppling over. While shelving, my ears perked to a noise that sounded a bit strange. I wasn’t sure how to describe it at first, almost a low gurgle, or the sound of a burp that got stuck in the chest. The second time I heard it, the noise sounded closer to a moan; someone trying to talk with peanut butter in their mouth. The wind howled just then, causing me to assume that all the prior noises had come from the weather, and not from something inside the library.
I’ve heard tales, of my library being haunted; books falling when no one was near; items being moved with no logical reason; people moving throughout the shelving when you are the only one in the building. I never really believed in ghosts or vampires or zombies or any of that stuff, they were all just things in stories…RIGHT?
So when those noises that I was hearing could be chalked up to something else, you can bet I assumed they were being made by perfectly harmless things. It wasn’t until the smells started floating through the library that I wondered if I had jumped to a premature conclusion.
My nose took me twisting to and fro among the selves. I was about to give up when I rounded the corner and found…. A ZOMBIE!
I sprayed the Febreze (my only line of defense) and took off running. I rounded the corner at top speed, and hurtled over reading chairs. I dashed for the library phone to call the cops--no the National Guard--someone, anyone to come and save me.
I climbed a stack of boxes so I could get a better vantage point to see where the zombie was lurking. The hairs on the back of my neck started to prickle. I slowly turned my head fearing the worst. And of course my worst was confirmed. The ZOMBIE WAS RIGHT BESIDE ME!!!
No Animals were harmed in the creation of this blog…YET!
I flew off the boxes faster than a jet plane. I’m 100% sure I broke the sound barrier! I scrambled to my office and locked the door. I shoved all my book shelves, and storytime puppets and everything else in my office up against my door, leaving only the little window at the top uncovered so I could peek out and keep tabs on the zombie.
I’ve been under my desk now for 3 hours, 17 minutes and 45, 46, 47, 48 seconds. I’ve got a few days worth of supplies to keep me going. I’ve called the Pentagon to alert them to what is happening. I’m not sure when rescue will get to me. I’m hoping they will reach me before the zombie can figure out how to squeeze through the 12inch by 12inch window on the door.
I just peeked out and took a picture of what I saw…
Let’s hope that the books will tide the creature over.
· No Animals were harmed in the creation of this blog…YET!
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