Warning! Crazies are Loose and at the Library

Caroline Gordon once said, “A well-composed book is a magic carpet on which we are wafted to a world that we cannot enter in any other way.”  In the year and a half that I have lived at the library, I have traveled to more destinations than I can even begin to count.  I journeyed back in time to become a knight in King Arthur’s court, I soared at light-speed to fight alongside the Millennium-Falcon, and I even had a duel with the famous Harry Potter. Not only have books taken me on amazing adventures, but the building itself has served as a teleportation device to whisk me away to one of the craziest loony bins in the world. And where is this loony bin? I’m glad you asked. This loony bin is none other than…. THE LIBRARY! Now, I’ve never had it confirmed but I’ve come to the conclusion that in order to be a librarian you must be CRAZY! I swear I work with some pretty crazy coo-coo birds.  Let us take a moment and look at the evidence that I have collected.

 Exhibit A- Kathy

Kathy is your typical “I have the best conversations with myself” type of person. Not a day goes by that I don’t find myself strutting up and down the aisles in search of a good book, than what to my wondering eyes should appear, but Kathy talking away with no one to hear.  This gal can carry on a conversation with herself for hours. And I’m not talking about just chatting; Kathy will get into verbal fights with herself. Now I’m sure she is more likely to be yelling at books that are miss-shelved but I like to think that she’s just crazy and fighting with her imaginary friend.

Exhibit B- Corbin

This guy is constantly being caught doing something CRAZY! Take for instance the other day. I was minding my own business, reading the new magazines that had come in, when all of a sudden a giant black mass went whizzing by my head. I flipped over away from whatever it might be. I heard a quiet “plunk” as the mass landed in my water dish. I slowly crept forward to investigate. I was right on it when I caught a whiff of the foulest odor that I had ever sniffed. The smell was warping my brain. Just seconds before I passed out Corbin reached down to pick it up. I came back from my blackout and saw that he was wearing only one sock. The nasty smell was radiating off of his other sock that he had catapulted into my water dish. Crazy here was trying to wash his socks in my water dish! How absurd of him! But don’t worry. I’ll get him back somehow.

Exhibit C- Erin

Yep, this is Erin! She’s my trusty right hand man… I mean woman. There’s never an adventure that she’s not ready for. But on the crazy scale… She takes the cake!!!! HAHA get it cake, HAHA spider cake! I just crack myself up sometimes!!!! Anyways... this gal is the epitome of crazy. She drips with craziness. If you look up crazy in the dictionary her picture would be next to it.  Erin dresses up in crazy outfits, long skirts and fluffy sleeves. I’m not sure if there isn’t a skirt she hasn’t tripped in or gotten me stuck in. She’s always talking in crazy voices. And the sad thing is… I understand her most of the time. She also has “her” toys.  Toys that I’m not allowed to play with. I just want to read stories with her stuffed dogs, but no, she flips out every time I get close to them. So I just sneak them away at night and leave them around the library. HEHEHE…this really messes with her OCD. I’m so evil. I’d have to say, even with all of this, I’m only scratching the surface to the Erin crazy train.

I’m still working on collecting evidence to prove the crazy level of everyone else. I’ll update you on my findings as I accumulate them. I’m just hoping that I’m not going to start having to wear a hazmat suit so I don’t catch the crazy. I hear it’s contagious.

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It's a Bird...It's a Plane... NO it's BAT KITTY!!!

Dunananana……. Dunananana……. Dunananana…..

BAT KITTY

Faster than a speeding bullet. More cunning than a fox. Able to jump incredible distances in a single bound. Can consume quantities of food larger than herself. Rescuing helpless books as they tumble to the ground. Bringing lost stuffed animals back to their homes. Protecting library patrons from reaching total and complete boredom annihilation.

It’s a Bird… It’s a Plane… NO it’s BAT KITTY!!!

                                                

Today’s day started out like any other. I’d had my bowl of milk, and was just settling down to scan through the list of new books. My ears perked up as I heard a *KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK* on my door. “Come in,” I meowed. In walked Erin clutching a picture almost in tears. “You must help me Bat Kitty. Terry’s Hedwig has been owl-napped!”

I listened as she sputtered out all the details. Erin had just walked into the children’s room to shelve some books and upon her return she found this picture and a note saying that we must pay Hedwig’s ransom or Hedwig would be sent to live with Draco Malfoy. 

“Please Bat Kitty! Help me find Hedwig before it’s too late.” I accepted the mission. I felt that it was my duty to save this poor defenseless owl. Plus Erin told me that she’d pay me in treats. So with all the paperwork in order I started my search for the missing owl. The first place I headed was the scene of the crime. For the past two weeks Hedwig has been perched on the top of the Harry Potter Movie Party display, telling patrons about the upcoming events at the library. I dusted for fingerprints. I pounced for footprints. I even sang for something, for anything that might help me find this missing owl. In the end I came up empty pawed. I had given up hope of finding anything that could lead me to Hedwig and started to walk away. Just as I did my tail snagged the corner of the display, bringing it to the ground. When the dust cleared, sitting on the top of the mess was the clue I had been looking for.

I now held in my paw the clue that I needed to solve this mystery. This clue was none other than a picture of the paw of the kidnapper. From here my task was simple. For the next few minutes I slunk around the library taking pictures of who was in the library when the owl-napping had occurred. Now I just had to compare the pictures that I took of their hands to the picture of the owl-napper’s hand. I soon had my answer.

I lined all the suspects up, ready to divulge the conclusion I had come to. “Erin I’m pleased to tell you that I have figured out who the owl-napper is. After much searching and research I can say without a shadow of a doubt that the owl-napper was…… KATHY!” “Muawhahaha. Very good Bat Kitty But you will never find Hedwig. She’s already halfway to Draco’s by now” cackled Kathy. “Oh but I’ve already found her,” gloated Bat Kitty. “That was the simple part. I knew she’d have to be caged to be shipped, and that my cage would be an easy one to use. I checked there and that’s just where I found her.” “You’ve saved her!” squealed Erin. “I would have gotten away with this,” howled Kathy “If it weren’t for you Bat Kitty.”

I placed Kathy in time out to think about what she had done. Erin sat Hedwig back up where she belonged just as Terry came in the door. I’d say today was a successful one. I helped a damsel in distress, freed a caged owl and placed the culprit in timeout. Such is a day in the life of…

Falling Plants, Mutilated Nails and Grinding Teeth

Update from last week. The teen group looked great on their float, however the float gods didn't smile down on them and sadly they didn't win anything.

For today's library news update, the top stories are falling plants, mutilated nails and grinding teeth. Today's work day started off with normal traffic flow no tie ups or crashes down the book shelf asiles. I was throwing together a quick morning work out (I was busy sleeping all night and didn't do my jumping exercises), when Josh came running at me with a very much alive cricket! I jumped up and darted to the top of the information center. This lovely piece of furniture is about 6 feet tall and is just out of jumping distance for the crickets. Now don't get me wrong, I love crickets, just as long as they are wounded or not very active. When they can out jump me, that's when they become a problem. So I was now up on my perch, hiding behind a plant and trying to escape this extra crazy cricket. When I thought that Josh had finaly left me alone I turned around and there he was. I back peddled so fast that I wasn't watching where I was going. I knocked the plant off and brought everyone to a fit of laughter.

I climbed down and tried to settle into my chair, hoping for a nice nap. Erin and Vickie had other plans. Erin pounced on me and tied me down. She gagged my mouth and told me to be quiet. While she did that, Vickie pinched each of my toes, forcing my claws to poke out. She then took out a giant machete and started to hack away at my claws. I squirmed and tried to fight my way out but Erin kept me pinned down. I screamed and hollered to no avail. Finally, after what felt like an eternity, they stopped and let me go. My poor toes! My lovely claws that I had worked so hard to grow and sharpen were filed down to nubs. At this point I figured that there was no way that my day could get any worse. But of course, it did.

Just as all the torturing had stopped, the most horrid noise started echoing thoughout the library. A rumbling, growling, terrible screeching filled the air. I ran for cover, scared to know what was coming for me. I knew that this must be the end. My little kitty life was over. A monster was coming to have me for a snack. Tears squeaked out of my pinched closed eyes. This was it... Any second now... It was coming... It was taking longer than I thought...Maybe it stopped to have Erin for a snack on its way to me... Here it comes... Oh come on, where are you already? I opened my eyes and to my relief I realized that the noise had stopped and there was no monster in sight. I crept out of my hiding place. Cautious that it might still be out, I slowly searched the library, unable to find anything that could have made the noise. Just as I was about to give up it started back up again. I flew up into the air. The monster was right in front of me. The only problem was that I couldn't see it. The back door was keeping it outside. I knew that Terry had said that the door was having trouble opening so I figured that I was safe within its hold. I started to let my guard down just as the door swung open. Every hair on my body was standing on end. I could just make out its shadow through the bright light streaming in. I darted away, rushing to save myself. I turned around and saw Erin walking towards the monster! As scared of the monster as I was there was no way I was going to let it eat Erin! I raced towards her, preparing to die for her protection. The monster started to grind its teeth together. I yelled at Erin to get back! That monster was going to eat her! She couldn't hear me over the noise. I darted in between the monster and her. I raised my back and started hissing! The monster quieted. Erin scooped me up, and started telling that it was okay, that it wasn't going to hurt us. I looked out at the monster and realized that it wasn't a monster at all, but the city guys who had come to fix the door. I felt silly for having gotten spooked over nothing. But Erin hugged and thanked me for trying to protect her and I got a treat out of the deal. By now I was exhauasted and just wanted to sleep. Erin set me down and I curled up in my bed. And to think, all this happened before lunch. Lets hope this afternoon is not nearly as eventfull.

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Where Mold Spores Become Golden Nuggets

Over the last week the staff has been running around like chickens with their heads cut off. IT’S FALL FESTIVAL TIME! And just like last year we’re putting a float together. Erin and some of the teen group have been getting together the past two Tuesday nights and have been constructing some really crazy stuff. They connected some pool noodles together and filled the shape with balloons. It looked like she and the teens were building a model of a mold spore. Erin had once again totally confused me with her contraption. I chocked it up to her being a teensy bit crazy, (most librarians are) and went about my business for the evening. An hour or so had passed and I decided that I should probably go and check to make sure that the mold spore hadn’t decided to eat Erin or any of the other teens as a snack. They had covered it with paper mache and it now looked like a lumpy blimp. I was just about to compliment them on their fine art work when a large glob of flour water paste landed on my face. I tried to wipe the gloppy mess off and it got tangled in my whiskers. It covered my paws and I couldn’t flick it off. I walked away hoping to be able to wash it off in the sink. I looked back and I realized that I was leaving little white foot prints everywhere that I went. I screamed, frustrated to be covered in this gloppy mess. Erin was having all the teens clean up the mess, when she heard me making my lament. She took me and washed the goo out of my fur as best as she could. Days later the mold spore blimp was taking further shape. Terry had tied it to a trash can, and Erin, Terry and Alice spray painted it gold. Terry and Alice both agreed that it looked like a golden nugget. Too bad we couldn’t cash it in for a new library. They all started calling it the Golden Globe Award. Everyone on the float is to be dressed like different countries, showing that the whole world is celebrating Valley’s Fall Festival. I’m really hoping we win a prize. The group did last year so the chances are pretty good that we’ll win again. Erin said this year’s float is cooler than last years. Let’s cross our fingers and hope for the best. I’ll keep you updated on our prize status! Until next week…

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I Can't Feel My Tail... Call 911

Of all the places in the world, one would never guess that a life altering injury would occur at your public library. Now, I’ve taken a tumble or two off of the tables or book shelves but until today nothing like this has ever happened. This day is one what will forever be ingrained in my memory. I was being a perfect angel, sitting behind the circulation desk assisting Terry, Erin, Josh and Corbin with library business. Everything was flowing nicely, books were coming in and out; computers were being used and my favorite patrons had already made their stops in to see me. I was listening in on a website update conversation when… OOOOOOUUUUUUCCCCCCHHHHHH…a giant (who shall remain nameless… *cough* Corbin) viciously crimped, mangled, and obliterated the tip of my tail. I screeched and the monster *cough* Corbin, had no idea what he had done! I spun around and started to deface his foot and leg with my outstretched claws. Slowly he came to his senses and looked down. It felt like a millennium before he finally lifted his foot off my now dying tail. I sprinted to the back, searching for a place to cower and lick my wounds. Try as I might, no amount of flicking my tail would bring life back into the tip. I screamed and hollered and wailed.  Erin came back to find me and I curled up and balled in her arms. Erin looked over my tail and as she massaged the dying piece, a miracle happened and my tail started to twitch. The feeling slowly crept back into my tail and the crisis was averted.  When I had finally calmed down, Erin carried me out to show everyone that I was still living. The monster *cough* Corbin, felt sorry for the part that he played in atomic bombing my poor defenseless tail. He gave me a treat, and the final bits of pain slowly slipped away.  

Almost losing my tail made me realize that I couldn’t give up all my spying skills. The ability to spin out of any dangerous situation, to identify the enemy before they attack and having the knowledge needed to defeat them before they attack me, were all skills that I deemed necessary to continue improving on for my safety while living in the library.  While I no longer hold an ill will towards the monster *cough* Corbin (karma made him run into a cart), I still feel the need to be ready and waiting for the next opportunity when my special skills are called upon. As the saying goes: failure to prepare is preparing to fail.

10 Minutes Later

Strange things have been happening since the tail smashing. I’ve discovered that the tail tip has started twitching whenever danger is approaching. I’m seriously contemplating becoming a super hero. This freak accident may have just been an excellent new addition to my cornucopia of skills. Wait a second….. My Kitty Senses are Tingling….. I’m off to save the world.

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Now is the Time-- To Remember

Winter has warmed, Spring has sprung, Summer has sizzled, and now the cool breath of Autumn falls upon us. I awoke to a surprise Sunday; the air had a slight bite to it. The scorching heat of summer was now falling victim to the cool breeze of fall. Of all the seasons, Autumn is my favorite. There is something entrancing about Autumn. Walking down a path surrounded by trees, watching as lifeless pieces of art glide softly down to earth; closing your eyes and listening to the wind dance through the leaves; lying on a blanket gazing skyward, watching the beam from your flashlight slowly disappear into the stars. Many people believe that Spring brings new life. I say that’s Autumn’s job. Without death there can be no life; one gives, so another can live. The flowers slowly wither, the dark of night starts seeping into the light, and the cool touch of the clouds prepares us for cooler days. Cooler days remind me of holidays; holidays always remind me of those who I care about. Holidays make me thankful; thankful to have found a home; thankful to have people who care about me; thankful to be safe.

Last week Erin set up a display about September 11^th 2001. She had hung up two shirts: one in memory of the police officers who died that day, and one from the fire station across the street from the twin Tower, who lost a whole ladder company that day. There were fire boots, and a police hat, a doll and some pictures. Below each picture was a number: 49-Lost on United Flight 93; 125-LOST at the Pentagon; 23- NYPD LOST; 343- FDNY LOST; 2,985- total lives LOST. I didn’t understand what all these numbers and pictures meant. I flipped through the books that she had set out along with the display. Terrorists had flown two planes into the Twin Towers, a third into the Pentagon. A forth missed its intended target, The White House and Congress, and crashed in a field in Pennsylvania. I couldn’t understand why anyone would want to hurt America, hurt the American people… hurt my family. I wasn’t here when 9/11 happened. But my family was; as were many of my library patrons. Erin’s final touch to the display was a sign that asked one question: “Where were you?” For many who were alive that day, they can tell you exactly where they were. They can tell you where they were when each plane hit. They can tell you where they were when the towers came crashing down. They can tell you where they were. “Where were you?” It makes you stop and remember. Remember-- those who were innocent and died because they were in the wrong place at the wrong time. Remember--those who risked their lives to save others. Remember--those who are still hurting.

On September 11, 2011, I want you to remember. Remember--those you love. Remember--those who are lost. Remember--those who fight to keep America safe. Remember--what America is and all the lives that have been lost to make her what she is today. Remember!

What will you do to remember?

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My Spying Days are Done... For Now

Why does it never fail that the best ideas come out of the most awkward situation? Ok so I'm getting ahead of my self. Let me start from the beginning. So after my last blog I decided to tap more into my spy senses. You see I love love love creeping on people from up above on the top of shelves with the unsuspecting victim completely blind to my being up here. And when they least expect it, POUNCE! (heheheheheh) But over the last few creepings I started to realize that people were actually seeing me up above and just pretending I wasn't there. So I figured that I'd try creeping from below. At night when I have the library to myself I turn it into my own personal workout facility. I jump, I pounce, I run, I climb, and my biggest secret of all..... I read! I pull the books off the shelves and discover new ways to enhance my super spy skills. After a few days of practice I decided to put them to the test....

The Library had just opened and no patrons had come yet. I slipped out the inner door and into the foyer when the first patron came in. I tripped on her feet and she saw me. That tattle tale told Erin and she came out to get me. I tried again as the patron was leaving. I stayed right on her heals and out I went. (hehehehe) She didn't even catch a glimpse as I slid under the table out there. I stayed out there for quite some time, enjoying the warm sunbeams streaming in through the glass. After a while I started to get bored, however, the door had swung shut seconds after I had slipped out and I was now stuck in the foyer. Plus I really had to use the litter box. Part two of the spy plan...become friends with the "enemy". I peaked through the window and saw Erin staring back at me. I darted into the corner just as she was opening the door. I raced between her feet and through the open door. Seeing this as a game she tore down the aisle after me. I zoomed around the corner and waited. Just as she appeared I pounced at her and out of her mouth came a scream. I started laughing and took off running. I rounded the next corner and there she was, waiting for me. I jumped 12 inches into the air! And in that moment I realized that spying just wasn't for me. I didn't have the nerves of steel required for the job. With my feet planted firmly back on the ground I sheepishly slunk away, only to have Erin scoop me up in her arms to give me a big hug. I was super embarrassed after being surprised, and just wanted to hide. Erin hugged me and gave me a kiss and told me that she loved me... It was in that moment that I realized that my true calling wasn't spying but rather sharing a bit of love with those who are close to me. This is never something that one should take for granted. So I now lay curled up at Erin's feet, listening as she works away, happy to have this place that I call home.

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Lets Timewarp in Our Box Fort

Let's do the timewarp again.... It's just a jump to your left... and a step to your right.... put your hands on your hips... and pull your knees in tight.... and do the pelvic thrust..... and you sha-a-a-ake..... Lets do the timewarp again.

I was sucked into a timewarp today as I helped Erin put up an Eric Carle display. The Very Hungry Caterpillar was one of my all time favorite books when I was just a kitten. That and the Bad Kitty books. The Kitty in those books reminds me of myself. Bad Kitty's newest adventure is about to hit the Library shelves. Alice and Vickie are about done processing it! I'm super excited I can't wait to get my paws on it. The title is Bad Kitty Meets the Baby. Note to self, research what a baby is....BRB (be right back) *Google searching*...... OHHHHH That's what a baby is....Bad Kitty is in for some fun!

Speaking of new books. All the new book shelves are full and there's hardly any room for me to jump up on to them. I think patrons need to come in and check them all out. I miss my stalking spots. Nothing beats creeping on patrons from above when they have no idea. (heheheheheheheh)

*ears perk up* I think I just heard the UPs truck pull up! That means new books, and boxes to play in! Must pounce on them before anyone else can. Those boxes are mine for a box fort! Maybe I can get Terry and Kathy to help with the tape. Fur and tape don't get along very well.

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That's it for now. A box fort is calling my name. Bye! 

Curled up with a Good Book

Ahhhhhhhhhhh! Just spent another day curled up in my favorite chair. I'm a little sad. Some of my kids had to go back to school today and the rest will return on Monday. I'll miss them but I understand that school is important so I wish them all the best of luck with school this year! Story time is about to start back up! That always makes me excited. I'm hoping to meet new friends this year. New friends are the best! Old friends are great too! Erin helped me start a great program this summer. It's called Pages's Pals. I wanted to buy school supplies for all the children in the community but alas I don't get an allowance. So Erin said that I should ask my friends for help. So far I have filled two boxes full of school goodies to donate. I'm really excited! I hope they all like them. 

I learned today that the Library staff have put me on a diet. Something about me gaining a little weight. But the mischievous side of me is plotting a way to get more food. While chasing Erin up and down the aisle I stumbled upon a quote that might work to my benefit. “Cats always seem so very wise, when staring with their half-closed eyes. Can they be thinking, "I'll be nice, and maybe she will feed me twice?"-Bette Midler. Hummmmmm -- Let’s see if this works.

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